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Letters

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A Letter about Vacations

Dear Uncle Ernie, Hello! How are you? And how is aunt Bertina? I hope you guys are doing well! We just got back from vacation. It was a really good vacation, as most all of them are. I can’t think of too many bad vacations, actually. I suppose some of …

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A Letter about the Power of Power

Dear Reggie, Hello! How is my favorite cousin? Don’t tell all of the other cousins that I said that, by the way. It might start a riot or something. Let’s just keep that between us. And don’t ask if I tell that to all of the cousins, either, okay? Anyway, …

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A Letter about the End of School

Dear Intrepid Iguana, Hello! How is your career in professional wrestling going? I just know you are going to make it in the big time one of these days. And I will be proud to say that I knew you way back when you were just Lyle. And yes, I …

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A Letter about Jury Duty

Dear Uncle Reginald and Aunt Gladys, Hello! How is life up there in the big city? I am glad that you guys enjoy it there, because someone has to live there, I guess. But I still am quite happy with the small town life. Speaking of that, here is a …

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A Letter About Senior Discounts

Dear Uncle Clovis and Aunt Ethyl Ann, Hello! How are you? How are things down on the farm? I hope you are keeping the chickens in line. I know they can be difficult sometimes. How are they liking the egg-shaped disco ball you put in the chicken house? Anyway, it …

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A Letter to Alexander Graham Bell

Dear Mr. Bell, Ahoy! How are you? Do your friends call you Alex? Or Al? Or Teddy Graham? Or do they even call you? That of course brings me to your great invention of the telephone, which is of course what people use to call each other these days. But …

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A Letter to Friday

Dear Friday, Hello! How are you? I get the feeling that while most people have a deep appreciation for Friday, they also take you for granted, so I thought that I would make sure you know just how much we love you. After all, all days were not created equal. …

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